Belling the Cat

[fuckyeahloki]

[OOC: Continued from here

Hello, Bruce, did you miss me?

[He's manspreading on the nearest chair, appearing there only a second before in black roiling space and eldritch blue energy. With a neat little gesture, Loki tucked the Tesseract back into his pocket dimension. He looked no worse for wear after a rather extended meeting with the King of Asgard. Pleasant person, that Valkyrie. He rather owed Bruce for this particular blind introduction.]

Or do you prefer Brulk now? Hulce? We never did nail down those particulars and I would hate not to use your preferred manner of address.

[He's smiling with teeth as he moves onto the unpleasant part. Another flick of his wrist and there's the control device.]

I've brought you a gift. Do text my generous King, long may she reign, to let her know it arrived safely.

[And there's the smile turning into a baring of teeth, just the flash of a silent snarl before Loki just looks generally congenial again.]

Comments

[fuckyeahloki]

You’re getting very good at this.

[The efforts it takes to not let Loki wriggle his way into twisting the rules is always appreciated.]

I agree.

[Simple as that.]

[hulkbusted]

[Loki is probably the inspiration for a number of law-twisting tricksters in Earth mythology.]

If you decide your check-in should come while I'm in the shower, I'm not responsible for your eyes or imagination.

[fuckyeahloki]

As though my amusements would be so juvenile.

[ He’s more likely to pop up at moderately inconvenient times, such as the middle of Bruce superheroing, or holding a volatile chemical compound, or posing with childen.]

Though I would point out I am hardly omniscient. If I let myself in and you’re showering or mid-coitus, I will wait patiently until you are finished.

[hulkbusted]

If you feel like it, they will.

[If he pops up while Bruce is getting his Hulk on, Loki will be lucky not to be counted as one of his problems to smash.]

If you show up and I'm having sex, leave a note for your check-in and get out.

[Hey, there are Hulk groupies...]

[fuckyeahloki]

[ He simply spreads his hands toknowledge that’s probably true. ]

Mm. I’ll have to text the Valkyrie, in that case. Possibly take a picture as proof. Of my being here, not of your... attempts at murder by impalement. Assuming everything is... proportional.

[hulkbusted]

You can ask your brother, and no, you won't take pictures unless you want me to beat you to death with my proportionality.

[fuckyeahloki]

That was legitimately the most horrific threat I’ve ever received.

[Congratulations.]

And as close as you and the Odinson are- were- I’d rather have no details on that matter from anyone.

[hulkbusted]

Good. Let's not have to put it to the test.

[He's not going to disabuse Loki of the notion that he and Thor ever got that close, if only because it can itch at Loki's mind's eye if he thinks about it.]

What are you going to do when you aren't taking up space in my house?

[fuckyeahloki]

[He won’t think on it very hard. Though the anatomy of it...]

Taking up space elsewhere. Trying out new hobbies. Botany, perhaps. Mindfulness.

[There really is going to be a lot of time to fill. And you know what they say about idle hands.]

[hulkbusted]

[It’s challenging. Think about proportional output, too.]

Writing plays in your memory?

[Thor gets talky when drunk.]

[fuckyeahloki]

[That is delightfully awful. Thor never does anything by halves.]

A hobby of my future self? It has merit. So many things to tell, and all.

[ And no one to refute them.]

A firsthand experience or the maudlin recollections of the Odinson?

[hulkbusted]

And no one to say whether you’re lying?

[He has another swig of ale and sets his sweater aside, folding his arms over his chest.]

Friends are there when their friends are grieving the loss of their father, brother, homeworld, and half of what few Aesir were left.

[fuckyeahloki]

Aren’t all stories lies and all lies, stories?

[ He has something very uncharitable to say but leaves that comment sheathed for later and changes tactics. ]

You said Odin perished, but made no mention of the Queen?

[hulkbusted]

No.

[He leaves it that because he’s faced with another piece of unpleasant news.]

Oh.

[He rubs a hand over his mouth and lose the majority of his wary hostility.]

She’s gone. Has been for ten years. There were... elves?

[fuckyeahloki]

Elves.

[He says this flatly.]

In Asgard. And that useless old goat allowed...

[ There are some things much closer to the surface than he’d like to admit, futile anger because there is nothing and no one to take it out on that bore responsibility. ]

She yet lives in my proper time.

[hulkbusted]

I don't know the whole story there, I'm sorry.

[Bruce isn't a cruel person, and even if Loki's milking any of this for leverage, he can't be anything but gentle about it.]

But Thor thought you'd died after that, too, and he wasn't throwing any parties about it.

[fuckyeahloki]

[There's always a little milking with Loki, it's in his nature to use everything to his advantage. The rest is.... a snarl of pain, grief, anger...and the effort to only let a strategic amount show.]

Relief hardly merits celebration. I'm sure he spared a moment to think charitably upon my memory.

[hulkbusted]

He was in pain when he believed you were dead, and he was in pain again after Thanos killed you in front of him because he loves you.

[He takes a long pull from his ale and turns his head away while he suppresses a burp.]

Family's a hell of a thing.

[fuckyeahloki]

Yet here I am when Thanos is not. I do enjoy outliving my enemies.

[He rises.]

And my family.

[He regrets that for the thought of Frigga, but won't take it back. Not in the face of his parole officer.]

Do let me know if you intend to drop by. I'd hate to be caught unawares by company.

[hulkbusted]

[Bruce's expression isn't overtly hostile. Barely. Mommy issues? He's not talking about it.]

I'll give you that when you return the courtesy.

[fuckyeahloki]

[More issues than a comic series.

But he doesn't use the Tesseract. He simply uses the door with a vaguely dismissive hand motion over his shoulder at Bruce.

He's glad he gave his neighbor's address. Building numbers. So complicated. Can't blame him, really, he's an alien.]