Belling the Cat

[fuckyeahloki]

[OOC: Continued from here

Hello, Bruce, did you miss me?

[He's manspreading on the nearest chair, appearing there only a second before in black roiling space and eldritch blue energy. With a neat little gesture, Loki tucked the Tesseract back into his pocket dimension. He looked no worse for wear after a rather extended meeting with the King of Asgard. Pleasant person, that Valkyrie. He rather owed Bruce for this particular blind introduction.]

Or do you prefer Brulk now? Hulce? We never did nail down those particulars and I would hate not to use your preferred manner of address.

[He's smiling with teeth as he moves onto the unpleasant part. Another flick of his wrist and there's the control device.]

I've brought you a gift. Do text my generous King, long may she reign, to let her know it arrived safely.

[And there's the smile turning into a baring of teeth, just the flash of a silent snarl before Loki just looks generally congenial again.]

Comments

[hulkbusted]

[Loki appears while Bruce is sewing a flap of leather back onto the shoulder of his sweater where it came loose. He’s using a needle the size of an awl and bloodlessly pokes himself with it when Loki startles him by just appearing in his house.]

Knocking. It’s a thing here on Earth. I expect you to practice it.

[He sets his glasses aside and holds out his hand for the control while he flips his phone over and swipes it open.]

What ground rules did you two agree on? [Like he isn’t going to get a copy of any agreement from Val, since he doesn’t trust Loki.]

[fuckyeahloki]

Then you ought to have attended my audience with the King and added in your own expectations.

[He clucks his tongue and straightens.]

Mm. Interesting. Should I tell you all of the things we agreed upon or the things that The Great and Glorious King of Asgard, long may she reign, agreed for on behalf of you and the remains of your SHIELD. What a dilemma. I should let you ask and be answered. You know. Possible state secrets and all.

[He's just being an ass. Val will tell Bruce everything. There's probably a few petty things in there. But for the most part, no acts of villainy, unless the greater good calls for acts of villainy, regular check ins, no toppling governments without the aforementioned permission of Bruce or Val, etc etc add whatever you like.

Loki gives a long suffering sigh as he tosses the control from hand to hand before lobbing it underhanded at Bruce.]

Catch.

[hulkbusted]

[Catching’s a lot easier with Hulk reflexes. Good thing he’s learned how to control his strength, though.

Then he triggers it.]

Just checking.

[Reading the copy of the agreement that Val’s already sent can wait a minute.]

[fuckyeahloki]

[To be absolutely fair, Val had already triggered it to make sure it worked, so he could fake the reaction... however... he has not (yet) tampered with it.

So there he is, dropping to the floor in a twitching, undignified heap.

It's fortuitous, really, that he's never wearing his horns when this happens.]

[hulkbusted]

[Don’t think Bruce won’t be cloning this thing, but for now, he releases it almost as soon as Loki hits the floor, nods, and tucks it into his pocket.]

Now I know it works. There’s cold water in the fridge and a barrel of New Asgard ale in the pantry. Help yourself.

[In the meantime, now he can read the details of the agreement Val and Loki made.]

Your favorite brother at least once a day? What did you say to piss her off right before she put that in?

[fuckyeahloki]

[He wasn't cruel about triggering it, that's definitely a little window into Bruce's mindset and one that Loki will most definitely push his luck on later.

For now, he rises from the floor with all the sneering indignation of a wet cat, brushing off his suspiciously well tailored suit and actually going into the pantry for a glass of ale. Not his first choice, but it's a show of good will on his part. Though he won't start attempting to lull Bruce into a sense of routine and ease until later.]

Must I have done anything? I got the impression I wasn't too popular with her before introductions were even made.

[And then he's lounging in the chair he's claimed and tasting the ale. It isn't bad.]

Though, in hindsight, I might have been a bit too ... charming. She did fail to add in that I had to say it where others might hear it so I shudder to think of what state any contracts they've signed are in.

[hulkbusted]

[Yes, it says that Bruce mostly tries to be a decent hum— a decent person.

By the time Loki returns with his drink, Bruce has finished reading the contract and picked up his sweater and awl again. He really had been working on repairing it before, but now he’s using it to cover how furiously his mind is working on the problem of his being Loki’s fucking keeper.]

When we were on Sakaar, she beat the crap out of you and chained you up in her apartment. [He glances up and adds] And not in any way you found fun. So there might be a little history.

[fuckyeahloki]

[He just gives Bruce a sympathetic look.]

Are you sure it was a way I didn't find fun?

[Likely not, given his... reception.]

But you knew her from Sakaar. You and her, then Thor, my favorite sibling, and myself. You were there longer? Is that how this rational, shirt wearing version of yourself emerged?

[Not that he's complaining since he is not being intimately acquainted with Bruce's floor.

Keeper? Well. Loki prefers to think of this as a temporary amnesty that he can choose to break if something better arises.]

[hulkbusted]

The only thing I’m completely sure of with you is how little I trust you.

[But he’s reasonably sure that Loki didn’t like it all that much.]

She was there first, then me, then you, then Thor. I don’t know about most of your time there, but at least some of it was spent getting the codes to the Grandmaster’s orgy ship.

[Which... was a thing Bruce generally preferred not to dwell on. He occasionally still wants to wash his hands when he thinks of the Commodore.]

The rational, shirt-wearing man you see before you came about through my own work here on Earth.

Where are you staying?

[fuckyeahloki]

[That wounds him, Bruce. That does. Straight through the heart.]

Terrible start to a working relationship.

[He does smile faintly then, obviously he would identify the most high ranking person there and ... ingratiate himself to them. Have a little fun with the whole thing. Why not.]

That's awfully forward, don't you think? Especially for such a lack of trust.

[hulkbusted]

[Bruce is strong enough to bear the negligible weight of that guilt.]

The lack of trust is why I need to know where you're staying.

[fuckyeahloki]

New York.

[There are two reasons for evasiveness where Loki is concerned, one, he's just being an ass and drawing things out because he can. Or two, he probably did some low key act of villainy before their agreement was in place.

Loki really embodies that whole letter versus spirit of the law.]

[hulkbusted]

Address?

[He's definitely too focused at the moment for proper banter. Loki's just stuck with Business Hulk.]

And how are you paying for it?

[fuckyeahloki]

[Business Hulk is very low on Loki's amusement hierarchy of Banners.]

I murdered the previous owner and hid the body in a freezer.

[Said so blithely.]

[hulkbusted]

[The fuck you just say?]

And how are you paying for it?

[He's going to need that barrel of ale in a minute.]

[fuckyeahloki]

[You heard him.]

I took over their accounts, obviously.

[Still so blithe.]

[hulkbusted]

[Siiiiigh. He taps his phone and says:]

Call Val.

[fuckyeahloki]

I’m offended you trust my word when I admit to murder and at no other point.

[How absolutely rude..]

[hulkbusted]

[Bruce's phone, on the other hand, is starting to ring, having taken his voice command to call Val.

He hangs up and smirks at Loki.]

You were saying?

[fuckyeahloki]

If you keep calling her and hanging up, she’s going to assume I’m murdering you.

[Indignation. This is an utter lack of respect for what he is going through. Won’t someone think of the Loki.]

[hulkbusted]

She knows better.

[She helped train him, after all.]

[fuckyeahloki]

[He takes another long drink, then says conversationally-]

I never did say I was lying.

[And there’s a faint smirk turning up the corner of his mouth.]

[fuckyeahloki]

[He has played to the absolute letter of his agreement since its inception, staying largely to his loft on something of self imposed house arrest. He's been out, of course, as evidenced by the stack of books to the side of his lounge chair, but kept the outings brief so as not to arouse panic. Though, he seems to stir far less panic than he might have years ago.

For the moment, the majority of the books in his stack focus on international contract law. He might just be taking some of Bruce's advice about ingratiating himself into the sad dregs of the Aesir populace. They are not as he remembered which is more disconcerting than ire raising. There is wariness, yes, but a grudging sense of trust, of respect that feels more genuine than anything he ever had before his fall. Something apart of Thor, not his shadow- thought not- he snaps the book closed and stands up, pacing.

There's so much. The idea of him- changed, different, dead- an eerie feeling, but of what? Is it a sign? His future forked and that Loki took a path that ended him, so he ought to choose differently? Or is this something else. He doesn't know. He's not sure. That's one of the other reasons he's here and allowed himself to be seemingly contained with the control disk. He needs, what? Time? Silence? The ability to do absolutely nothing?

There might be one single self help book stuffed in the stack by his lounge. Impulse buy, he swears.]

[hulkbusted]

[Being Loki’s stateside keeper was never, ever one of Bruce’s aspirations, but once he’s accepted the charge, he treats it as the serious responsibility that it is.

This includes showing up at the address that Loki gave him and knocking, only to have the gentleman who answers the door very much not be Loki.

That small “mixup” may be why his knock at Loki’s door is particularly heavy, shaking the heavy door in its frame.]

[fuckyeahloki]

[Ah yes, there it is. The heavy-handed announcement of Bruce's first visit. Loki waits a solid few minutes before finally answering the door with the most innocuous of smiles.]

I do hope you found the address easily enough.

[He's certain the gossip at the mailbox wall will be interesting for the next few days, at least.]

Though must you knock so vigorously? Gentle taps. Gentle. This is hand carved, or so the agent said.